Merry meet Friends,
Michelle here, bringing lots of love and light!
"Once we commit ourselves to spiritual growth there is no day in our lives when we arrive at a place where we're complete and that's the end of it. The understanding that we're never finished growing is a wonderful thing. It can liberate us from our past, from who we think we are, and all our limited approaches to life." ~ Swami Chetanananda, The Open Moment; thanks to OSIS for posting
To know that I am still growing is indeed a wonderful thing. It means that I can start anew at any time I choose. I'm not tied forever to my past way of being or thinking; even if that way is considered a good way. I've been in a quandary ( a state of perplexity or uncertainty over what to do in a difficult situation) for the past week. This, of course, pertains to the job offer that I received last week. To some, I suppose, there should be no uncertainty. I need additional income and it is staring me in the face. What's the problem, then? I have no problem working, even at my age when most of my contemporaries are retired or retiring. No, it's not that. It's two things: the type of work and the location (city) of the work.
The job is as a Mental Health Technician. I would be working with those with mental and substance abuse issues. I have worked with both in previous jobs. I know that I am capable of handling any situation that I encounter, whatever that may be. The question is, do I want to be in that environment again? This has more to do with where I feel I am in consciousness as opposed to the people with whom I'd be assisting. It requires a certain energy, if you will, to handle certain situations. I am somewhere else entirely. Then there is the location of the job, Richmond. I do not want to settle here. Richmond is my place of birth and where I have spent most of my life. It is a beautiful place and the weather, overall, is pleasant. I don't consider it home though. Truthfully, I don't know if I consider anywhere home anymore or yet.
Having said that, I suppose it doesn't matter if I take the job for a time. I always said that wherever Spirit took me, if I were to be there awhile, I would seek employment. In that regard, it doesn't matter if it's Richmond. There are other variables in place. This job is shift work. Hours are not assigned because it's a PRN position. Techs work as needed and where they place their names on the schedule. One may work as little or as much as desired. The hours available for me would probably be evening or overnight. Since I don't have a car, it would be difficult for me to live anywhere not on a bus line. However, even on a bus line, I am not standing on a street corner in Highland Park at 11 pm or midnight, or downtown at a transfer point. Buses stop running at a certain hour anyway so even if I didn't mind waiting on a corner, there might not be a bus. Of course, there may be an employee living wherever I may be living with whom I could ride. But where would I be living?
"Decisions sometimes prove to be the hardest to make, especially when it's a choice between where you should be and where you really wanted to be." ~ unknown
I guess where I should be is in Richmond working this job, at least until I can save enough for a car to continue my journey. Where I want to be, is anywhere my Gypsy soul directs me. If i could find a room to rent without a lease, then maybe I would consider this more. I do not want to rent an apartment for a year or based on the salary from this job. I want anywhere that I live, at least for now, to be based on my steady monthly income. I have no desire to be evicted from a place due to non payment of rent. Been there, done that. Never again! I want to know that I can pay the rent whether I have employment or not. I was a stay at home Mom, so I didn't work much or for long periods of time, which means that SS isn't that great. I'm grateful for it but rent needs to be based on it. Decisions!
On Sunday, March 8th, I went to brunch with my friend Millie and her family to celebrate her birthday. We went to Southerly's on Broad Street. It's relatively new. The atmosphere was nice and, of course, as an adopted member of Millie's family, the company was good and conversation lively, as always. For the foodies that may be reading: I had catfish which had a very light coating and was delicious. It comes with collards and dirty rice which I couldn't have because it contained pork. I had a potato hash casserole, which was good and green beans which needed seasoning. From 3-5 on Sundays, ice cream is buy one, get one, in the store area. Millie's brother bought cones for all. I had not been eating sweets due to a binding contract set up by my son, Jason and to which the other children agreed. I had an ice cream cone though and informed them. LOL Millie's husband paid the food bill for everyone. It was a beautiful day with great weather.
On Monday, I went to the orientation for the job. When I spoke to the HR person while still in NY, the impression was that orientation needed to be as soon as possible and that there were others. I needed to be there at 9 am but not knowing the bus schedule, it would have been a rush to get the 8:06. I decided to listen to the still small voice, forgo that bus, and not stress. I continued to get dressed, walked to the bus stop, called GRTC for the time of the next bus and called HR to leave a message. The 8:45 bus was 15 minutes late. I had to transfer and that bus took about 15 minutes to get to the stop. I got to the office around 10 am, which was the original time HR told me. After being announced, a woman came out to water the plants and asked if I were the person she was expecting. I answered and asked if she had received my message. She said she had and no worries, she had just gotten there herself. Grateful for the still small voice, I would have been there an hour waiting for her! I was the only person in the orientation; a man didn't show.
The director came in to give me the offer letter and said that I had gotten there before she could mail it. I probably could have waited until Tuesday to start orientation, especially since I couldn't get the urine and TB test until then. I also had to go to the police station to get fingerprinted and over to the campus for a tour. The HR woman took me to the police station and waited to take me to the campus, in order for me not to have to take all of those buses, After the tour, I took the bus back to the main office. It was a productive day and I will be paid for it. Training was supposed to start that week but the manager I will be assigned wants me to train with her only. I am waiting to hear when that may be. The job site is located in Petersburg, but moving to Richmond in the next couple of weeks. Perhaps training will start then. I would like to make my decision about the job after I've trained, met staff and the residents. I need somewhere to live though and that will also determine if I take the job.
"Always go with the choice that scares you the most, because that's the one that is going to require the most from you." ~Carolyn Myss
"May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears." ~ Nelson Mandela
At first glance, these quotes appear to be saying the opposite, but they aren't. Making a choice out of fear is not the same as making a choice that scares you. Me, taking this job because I need money, while practical, can also be fear based. Choosing not to take it and continue to travel is a scary one: how will I travel, will I have enough, etc. The decision is truly mine to make but friends, I would love to hear what you think. Please comment in the comment box.
Until next Sunday,
Merry part and merry meet again,
Gypsi Mama Michelle